News
Halo Infinite multiplayer customisation includes soft furnishings and nice bonnets
“The fans have been clamouring for the options to give the Chief some personalised cushions since Halo 3.” […]
Month: June 2021
News
Whoops! Ben Hur’s laptop and 17 other classic movie bloopers
After visiting the village of the lepers, Ben Hur can be seen googling ‘Sexy Roman Milfs’ on his laptop […]
News
New Transformers film coming because God has forsaken us all and these are the end times
It is expected to feature big robots shouting at each other and herald the end of days. […]
Film Guide
Mega Shark vs Crocosaurus – Weekend Film Guide 2nd July
It’s the weekend! Time to dance naked in veneration of our Lord Pan. […]
News
Peaceful, ancient, wise galaxy-spanning alien civilization doesn’t even have out-of-town shopping village
It is also understood that they don’t have MP3 players, a reliable take-away food service, or trainers. […]
News
Jurassic World: Dominion teaser shows man and dinosaur as mismatched cops
“Dino-crime is on the rampage. This country needs…Dinocops.” […]
News
New Nintendo Switch Pro to be embedded in pair of trainers
“Come on Nintendo, it’s 2021, shouldn’t we really be looking to embed the console in roller-skates?” […]
News
Maverick cop reprimanded for lack of quips when knocking criminal unconscious
“We got regulations here. You’re a maverick cop? You got to do a quip.” […]
News
Elden Ring ‘Hardcore Mode’ will feature man punching you in the face as you play
“Being punched repeatedly in the face while you try and battle a zombie knight is quite a challenge.” […]
Film Guide
Hapless pub owner fails to pull ex – Weekend Film Guide 25th June
Hey you. It’s the weekend. A perfect time to complete ignore that massive list of stuff to do you’ve got and sit about in your pants eating biscuits and watching films. […]
News
So hot! Margot Robbie put on a sweater on a sunny day and has never looked hotter
“She was looking hot. I mean, really hot. She had a red face and was sweating a bit. Like, incredibly hot.” […]
News
Far Cry 6 allows player to craft funk band, fancy cakes, alternative reality
“You can create a chain of patisseries that can change the balance of the economy on Yara in your favour.” […]
News
New Guardian article just list of films with ‘that’s rubbish’ written next to them
The Star Wars films are all labelled as ‘unrealistic rubbish that would never happen.’ […]
News
Arrival sequel to see Amy Adams teach aliens to do the Macarena
“If you existed out of time, then you’d probably still think the Macarena was cool.” […]
News
Elder Scrolls VI remastered edition now expected before Elder Scrolls VI
Elder Scrolls VI is scheduled for 203X, whereas Elder Scrolls VI remastered edition is scheduled for 2029, just after Fallout: Doncaster. […]