Film Guide
Weekend Film Guide 9th March
It’s the weekend. You could go to the pub, but it’ll just be full of dreary men saying that the beer is quite ‘hoppy’ like that’s a thing. […]
Month: March 2018
News
Some words to accompany a picture of an attractive actress in a bikini
You will not read the words that accompany the picture of the attractive actress in a bikini, so the nature of these words is therefore irrelevant. […]
News
Raccoon quits Guardians of the Galaxy franchise
Despite having limited acting experience and being a raccoon, he is confident of carving out a career on his own merits […]
News
Film Awards awards to award the best film awards with awards
“The Oscars, The Fancy Acting awards, Farming Monthly’s best farming achievements in film – there are a huge number of film awards that make the film awards season so enjoyable.” […]
News
Drunken Meryl Streep demands McDormand fight her for Oscar
“She got right into Frances’ face and kept saying that they should settle it like her and Julie Andrews did in ’83 – with a fight in the car park.” […]
News
New Predator film features aging predator dealing with modern life
His grandson has bought him an Ipad, but he doesn’t really know how to use it yet. […]
Features
Screen Idlies – the Oscars. Only good.
Screen Idle proudly presents the Screen Idlies, the hottest new movie awards that’s got the whole of Tinsel Town talking. Probably. You certainly can’t prove different. […]
Reviews
Review – The Shape of Water
So, yeah, the woman who falls in love with a fish. If you think about it, it can’t be that unusual because if people didn’t fall in love with fishes then where would mermaids come from, right? […]
Film Guide
Weekend Film Guide 2nd March
Why not spend the entire weekend wrapped in a duvet, drinking prosecco from the bottle, and eating your own body-weight in malteasers […]
News
The Rembrandts refusing to ‘be there for you’ anymore
“The amount of people who have rung us with gearbox problems ALONE is incomprehensible! ” […]
News
Screen Idle denies crisis after failing to come up with an idea for an article
“I’ve done the Mary Poppins sequel, Dan did the Black Panther. I tore the arse out of Star Wars before Christmas. I’m just knackered for new ideas.” […]