News
All aspects of the forthcoming Tetris movie will fall neatly into place, producers reassure critics
“If this sounds confusing from a cinematic point of view then please rest assured that everything will fall into place” […]
News
Fast and Furious 9 to be profound examination of life as a 19th century Welsh hill farmer
Vin Diesel will play Gwyndaf Jones, a struggling hill farmer secretly in love with Myfanwy the post-mistress – played by the Rock […]
News
Regular patching to be applied to films from now on
Every initial cinema release will now by advertised as ‘beta’ and retroactively fix glaring continuity issues, plot holes and disastrous miscastings. […]
News
New animated version of live-action version of animated version of Beauty And The Beast in production
“We thought about doing a black and white version in French, but who’s going to watch that, right?” […]
Reviews
Review: Alien Covenant
Although set largely on another planet at a point in the future, the film is more relevant to how we live our lives today than films about how we live our lives today. […]
News
Marvel Comics Universe under threat after Microsoft withdraws Paint
“Without Paint, there’s literally no way we can make another superhero film, unless it’s the one about Accountancy Man” […]
News
Blade Runner 2049 plot is Deckard making a cup of tea before Poldark comes on
Set at 20.49 on a Sunday night at an undisclosed time in the future, Deckard and Ryan Gosling’s Officer K are both big fans of Poldark and looking forward to it starting as usual at 9pm on Sunday evening. […]
Movie History
The time that Brighton was the home of the Spaghetti Western
“Sergio had seen Brighton in Carry On At Your Convenience and was convinced that it was the perfect fit for Once Upon A Time In The West.” […]