New limited edition Switch 2 Joy-Cons ribbed for his and her pleasure

A new set of Joy-Cons for the Nintendo Switch 2 have been announced that will be ribbed for both his and her pleasure.

Instead of the smooth finish that standard Joy-Cons have, this new set will have a series of ribs about 5 millimetres apart for a sensual, stimulating experience for all players.

“One thing everyone involved with this new edition was conscious of was how the standard Joy-Cons, whilst very popular and well-designed, were not really very sensuous,” explained lead designer Kelly Grace.

“When a young couple is in love, and in a responsible relationship then, when one thing leads to another, they may end up playing Switch 2, which has always been a pleasurable activity.

“So, we started to think about what we could do, as a video-game company, to really enhance that pleasure.”

For over a year, Nintendo ran testing and focus groups in various cities around the world.

“Oh man, we tried a bunch of things, we really did. We had an intense, vibrating nubbin on each of the control sticks, we had the main console give off a variety of arousing scents, and at one point the Joy-Con was made of this new polymer that was utterly indistinguishable from human skin.

“But what couples really enjoyed, what really heightened both their pleasure was the ribbed effect on the Joy-Con. 

“It’s stimulating, but not overwhelming, it can be enjoyed by gay and straight couples and it just makes the playing Switch 2 the sensuous, erotic experience it really should be.”

Sony have yet to respond to Nintendo’s announcement, but they are rumoured to be working on a limited edition Dualshock controller that will include an eight-inch dildo.