It’s the weekend, time to set off on that epic quest with a plucky group of misfits to banish the evil wizard from the realm. But if that sounds like a lot of bother, then why not watch these great films instead.
Saturday
The Road Sony Movies 01.30
A father and son fight for survival in a grim, brutal and bleak post-apocalyptic world. Marginally nicer than it is now.
Passengers Film4 21.00
Jennifer Lawrence and Chris Pratt star in video for classic mid-level Elton John song.
You’ll be singing it all day, now.
The Expendables 5* 21.00
Action adventure starring everyone in Hollywood. Stuff blows up. People punch other people. Everyone goes home for a nice sit down.
Sunday
Edward Scissorhands Film4 18.55
Feel free to make your own jokes about wiping his bottom or picking his nose, I’m above all that sort of thing.
Lincoln Film4 23.35
Daniel Day-Lewis won an Oscar for his performance of a pretty Lincolnshire cathedral town in this Spielberg classic.
Armageddon Sony Movies 22.00
Bruce Willis saves the world by digging a big hole. Disappointingly, no one says ‘armageddon outta here.’
Netflix Film of the Weekend
Scent of a Woman
Hoo-Haa! Al Pacino does blind acting in stinky well-we’ve-got-to-give-him-an-Oscar-for-something 90s classic.
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