Review – Rampage

So, there’s totally The Rock, right, and he’s best mates with a gorilla who’s, like, totally nice and clever and everything.

But then, right, there’s this, like, big genetic ray thing and it totally mutates The Rock’s best mate into a giant angry type of gorilla who goes and smashes everything up.

Totally thought provoking, right?

I mean, I’m there and I’m watching The Rock punch things to get his best mate back and unmutate him and all I can think about is Mucky Dave.

I’ve known Mucky Dave since were at school and we used to play in the park together and then we’d go out to gigs and that together and he used to get me these magazines that were…well, they’re probably not important.

What I mean though is that Mucky Dave is totally my best mate and I’d be really cross if someone mutated him into a giant angry Mucky Dave who goes round smashing things up.

So, you know, you can totally identify with The Rock’s, like, central goal, because, like I’d definitely punch things to unmutate Mucky Dave.

Yeah, so, totally a good film that really makes you appreciate how good it is to have a best mate whose, like, not a giant, angry mutant.

Screen Idle rating *** – No mutated best mates, man. Ever.