New Conjuring movie to see Warrens tackle ghosts of Christmas Past, Present, and Future

The new Conjuring movie will see the Warrens take on the notorious ghosts of Christmas Past, Future, and Present, it has been revealed.

“It’s going to be the Warrens’ toughest challenge yet,” said producer Stewart James.

“These are hugely powerful ghosts, some of the most powerful in all the history of the supernatural, but they’ve ruined countless businesses and businessmen’s lives and the Warrens just aren’t prepared to let that stand.”

The film will see the Warrens brought in to deal with the strange case of a successful small business owner who starts buying people turkeys and singing carols in the street.

“It’s an important business in the town, it employs a bunch of people, and the owner’s just gone a bit crazy. Of course, people are worried and, as ever, that’s something the Warren’s can’t overlook.”

After some investigation, Lorraine is able to use her psychic powers to discover that the company owner came into contact with a trio of powerful spirits who unbalanced his mind.

“The most terrifying thing about these spirits is their arbitrary nature. You can never know who they’ll target next. A banker in London, a New York TV executive. You just don’t know. Then they spend a night exposing you to the most horrifying visions imaginable and by morning, you’re nuts.”

Mr Stewart was unwilling to reveal how the Warrens deal with the ghosts.

“No, but come on, it’s The Conjuring, so you’d imagine there’ll be crucifixes, prayers and itinerant priests, a big special effect, and then everyone lives happily after.”

The Conjuring: God Bless Us, Every One will start filming early next year, ready for release the following holiday season.