Clint Eastwood’s next film is set to be his most ambitious yet – an adaptation of Marcel Proust’s monumental novel A la Recherche du Temps Perdu.
Proust’s famously intimidating book is ninety-four billion pages long and would need thirty-six kindles to hold the complete text
It’s about a man eating a biscuit.
However, rather than just be a straightforward adaptation, Clint is going to put his own unique spin on it.
“Yeah, most of that is just French crap,” said the revered Unforgiven director.
“So I’m going to strip all that stuff out about the cookie, I mean, what the hell is that about anyway? Guy eats a cookie, then remembers a bunch of stuff. No one wants to see that.”
“So, my adaptation will be about a man. A strong man. A man who doesn’t take any crap. These guys. They break into the man’s house and knock over his goldfish. So, he goes and kills them all. But feels a bit sad about it afterwards.”
Clint was asked to clarify if a man going on a bloody killing spree after some other men kill his goldfish is actually part of the plot of A la Recherche du Temps Perdu.
“Yeah,” growled the grizzled movie veteran.
“Towards the end. After all that French crap about the cookie. Anyone want to prove me wrong?”
I think everyone can agree that Marcel Proust would be pleased.
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