World of Warcraft demands UN aid after years of conflict

The World of Warcraft has issued a desperate plea to the UN for aid after aeons of conflict.

The war between the Alliance and the Horde has raged for centuries and whilst many individuals have tried to help by collecting ten boar’s heads or picking eight peaceblooms, their efforts have made little impact on the overall situation.

“Please, we just need help,” said Horde Warchief Vol’jin, or ‘Dave’ to his friends.

“I mean, granted, living in somewhere known as a World of Warcraft, you’d imagine we have experience dealing with endless war, but there is only so much we can take.”

The UN is said to be considering the request, but the World of Warcraft has faced criticism in recent years for not actually dealing with the business of resolving the war between the Alliance and the Horde and instead wasting time with the discovering of an island filled with sentient pandas or going back in time for reasons that proved confusing.

“We have to be certain that any UN aid would be used for the betterment of the peoples of the World of Warcraft,” said UN Secretary General Antonio Guterres.

“And not be used to swan about discovering an underwater country filled with snail-men who have no real bearing on the war.”