As Hollywood mogul Harvey Weinstein’s life unravels in a swamp of sexual assault allegations, he is said to be considering the only option left in America to a serial sex-offender – to run for President.
As a deeply unpleasant businessman with ties to the Democratic Party who used his power to harass and assault women, Donald Trump successfully ran as a Republican and became President following a campaign of outrageous lies and wild claims.
It is thought that Weinstein is easily capable of shifting political allegiance. He has already made a wild claim by suggesting that he ‘deserves a second chance,’ and lied outrageously by declaring that he ‘understood what I did was wrong.’
“Hey, look, I made a mistake,” said the disgraced producer.
“Who hasn’t though? Who hasn’t made that mistake, if you’re honest, who hasn’t spent the greater part of his adult life abusing women for their own gratification?”
Mr Weinstein then detailed his immediate plans
“Firstly, I’m going to check into a rehab centre as a few weeks lolling about in sweatpants playing Candy Crush in a lovely wood cabin in a remote forest is definitely enough to make up for a lifetime of sexual abuse.
“Then, I don’t know, it looks like the only place an honest American sex-pest can get a job is in White House, so I guess I may run for President.”
It is thought that should Mr Weinstein’s bid for President fail, then he may well talk to the Catholic Church as see if they’re still okay with promoting sex-abusers to high office.
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