inAn inquest into the death of an itinerant American artist who lost his life in the sinking of the Titanic has found that there was definitely room on that door for him.
The inquest was held after a complaint brought by James Bates, an unemployed gravel sorter from Chelmsford, Essex.
“Yeah, I was watching Titanic on Film4 one afternoon and it got to that bit at the end where Rose and Jack are waiting for rescue and was just getting ready for a big cry when I noticed the size of the door that Rose was on,” explained Mr Bates.
“It was massive, there was totally enough room on it for Jack. Easily. There was enough room for Jack, and all his paintings and his mate who sounds like Super Mario.
“But Rose, she just leaves him in that cold water. That’s pretty awful when you think about it.
“So, I went to the police. I mean, it’s clearly murder. She could easily have saved his life but she didn’t.
“She used him for sex in that car then let him die so she could go off and have her brilliant life of riding horses and spitting.
“Outrageous, really.”
Following Mr Bates’ complaint, an inquest was held and the conclusion of that inquest reads as follows:
‘The court finds that there was definitely room on that door for Jack, and Rose totally let him die. She must have been a right cow.’
The inquest into events on the Titanic will not result in any charges as the incident took place over one hundred years ago and is fictional.
Some links to other bits of the blog that you’ll love*…
*Alright, perhaps ‘love’ is pushing it, maybe ‘be mildly diverted by’
Want to know what’s on telly this next week? No problem, click on this TV Film Guide
Want to impress friends with your superior film knowledge? You’ll be wanting the Fun Facts page.
Be the first to comment