Study concludes Keanu Reeves is next stage of human evolution

A new study has confirmed that Keanu Reeves is the next stage of human evolution.

The study looked at human beings and all their flaws and problems and, after performing extensive science, concluded that Reeves is just so brilliant, he can only represent a new stage of human evolution.

“Well, I mean, just look at him,” exclaimed Stewart James, study leader and Oxford University’s Professor of Brilliant Men.

“The hair, the face, all of that. He’s just on a such different level that, scientifically, he’s almost a different species.

Then Professor James performed a series of experiments designed to discover how much of a brilliant bloke Reeves actually is.

“Turns out he’s a really, really brilliant bloke. He’d give you a lift, lend you a pound if you wanted a twix and he’d pretend to be interested in your stories about when you went fishing with your brother.

“I’m not saying he’s the most brilliant bloke ever, but he’s in the 95^th percentile.

He also scores highly in a variety of other skills.

“He knows kung fu, can shoot loads of bad guys, and is the best bus conductor ever.

“Scientifically speaking, he is clearly the next stage of human evolution and we’re probably not that far away from a time when all of humankind is like Keanu Reeves.”

With the world in the state it is now, a race of Keanu Reeves-like beings definitely can’t come soon enough.