Recent excitement that Martin Scorsese is making a Joker film has been tempered by suggestions that all he intends to do is digitally insert the Joker into his 1973 classic Mean Streets.
“What, you think I’m making a picture about a clown? You’re a clown,” said the legendary director.
“I’m Martin Scorsese, you don’t think I got better things to do than some dumb kids’ film. I made Raging Bull, Goodfellas, Kundun.”
“Yeah, I made Kundun, quit laughing. I know people.”
Initially, excitement was high at the prospect of one of the all-time greats of cinema turning his hand to the superhero genre and trying to make sense of the early life of one of comics’ most iconic characters.
“Yeah, I was buzzing about the news,” said superhero fan Jack Ledger.
“I mean, Scorsese doing the joker? It would be like The Dark Knight, but with actual swearing. Amazing.”
But the director was quick to quash any such enthusiasm.
“Nah, screw that. We’ll just release Mean Streets with a few scenes of Jack from that pussy eighties goth picture. Come on, it’s Mean Streets. It’s better than you mooks deserve.”
Mr Scorsese then went on to announce his next film
“It’s a nine-hour picture about an Italian monk planting a tree, and you people are going to watch it too. You know why?”
“Because I’m Martin f**kin Scorsese, that’s why.”
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