A man who is the spitting image of Joey Tribbiani from Friends has been caught criminally damaging BBC motoring show Top Gear.
Whilst hilarity ensued this week as a Ross Geller-lookalike stole some beer in Blackpool, a truly heinous two-year sustained campaign of vandalism was being inflicted upon one of the BBC’s most prized possessions.
Policeperson, WPC Eleanor Gay, said, “We were looking through the videos are there are around 15 hours of this man damaging Top Gear beyond all recognition.”
BBC Executive James Hammond, was visibly upset, “It is with great regret, that I must announce that the BBC’s only profitable show has been utterly defaced. The police asked me to identify it but, at first, it was so badly damaged I didn’t even recognise it.”
The show was eventually identified from dental records.
Thinking about lost global earnings, Mr Hammod had to compose himself before continuing, “We hope the culprits – this doppelganger and a tall ginger partner who had a permanent, Joker-like grin – have utterly ruined this masterpiece of controversy, this genius work of casual racism and misogyny, this – frankly – artwork that divides like no other artwork before or since.
“We have brought in a couple of experts who assure us they will restore it to its former glory: a cricketer who thinks he’s a boxer and a tall man.”
Original Joey, Matt Leblanc, distanced himself from the accusations, saying he was in California at the time of the recordings.
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