It’s the weekend. Well done progression of time, you got us here again. Let’s all celebrate by slumping on the sofa mindlessly watching these great films.
Friday
The Remains of the Day BBC2 14.15
Anthony Hopkins fails to get off with Emma Thompson in butler classic.
This is on a lot, so if you don’t want to interrupt your Friday afternoon in the pub to watch Hannibal Lector moon about a nice National Trust House, it’ll probably be on again tomorrow afternoon.
A Christmas Kiss GREAT! Movies ‘Classic’ 16.00
Well, it’s September, so it’s time for GREAT! Movies Classic to start showing back-to-back Hallmark Christmas nonsense. Ho ho ho.
London Has Fallen GREAT! Movies 21.00
Cheery old London bobbies are really terrorist bastards and only Gerard Butler can stop them. Everything blows up in the first twenty minutes and the rest of the film is fighting in studios that look unconvincingly like alleyways.
Saturday
King Kong ITV2 17.20
It’s the Peter Jackson version, so it started last Tuesday and finishes a week Thursday.
The Emoji Movie Comedy (!) Central 15.50
Proof that humanity is doomed
Home Alone 2: Lost in New York Film4 14.45
Oh, don’t you start Film4, it’s bad enough with GREAT! Movies Classic. IT’S SEPTEMBER! I’ve still got shorts on.
Sunday
Close Encounters of the Third Kind Channel 5 15.10
Hippie scientists defeat invading aliens by playing Jean-Michel Jarre music at them.
Features some business with mashed potato for some reason. Spielberg? He’s a genius, mate.
Christine Syfy 21.00
Haunted car murders everyone. Brilliant. I watched it when I was sick a few months ago, I’m now not sick. I’m not saying definitively there’s a connection, but you can’t argue with the evidence.
Battle Star Wars LEGEND 16.45
Hey, a new Star Wars film. I had no idea. Wow this is amazing. I’m so going to- wait, ‘Battle’ Star Wars? Oh, you guys.
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