Disney to focus on Star Wars spin-off experimental theatre and put films on hold

Disney has announced that, following Rise of Skywalker, Star Wars films will be put on hold while it focuses on spin-off experimental theatre.

The first Star Wars theatre production opened last summer in a small theatre in Budapest.

Empire 69 featured a nude man and woman wearing Darth Vader helmets saying ‘I am’ to each other for 90 minutes.

It is understood that twelve people saw it.

“I don’t think you can really measure the success of Empire 69 based on the number of people who watched it,” said Disney boss Bob Igor.

“It really pushed the boundaries of what people consider theatre to be, and that’s exactly what the Star Wars franchise should be doing.”

The next production will take place in an undisclosed location in Japan.

“Hutt Unbound is one of the most exciting projects I’ve been involved with,” said Igor.

“This is theatre at its most daring. It is so experimental that it contains no scripted dialogue or direction, sets, or even actors.

“Just two people who have a brief conversation somewhere.

“They won’t know they were in the production, we will never know who they are. All that is sure is that a brief moment of Star Wars experimental theatre magic occurred somewhere in Japan.”

He went on to detail other production plans.

“A C3P0 existential piece, Chewbacca Mustard, something with Finn in a box that just gets smaller – very exciting, Tatooine Basement, and Heaven Hell Purgatory Fett – we need three tonnes of cheese for that.”

Mr Igor refused to confirm whether any Star Wars experimental theatre would have promotional MacDonalds Happy Meal tie-in or videogame adaptations.