New Star Wars film to reveal Rey’s parents are R2D2 and C3P0

Star Wars fans were left stunned as news emerged that a new Star Wars film will reveal that Rey’s parents were actually C3P0 and R2D2.

“Yeah, it’s going to be a shock, I can see that,” said director JJ Abrams.

“I mean, most people just figure R2D2 is comedy relief and C3P0 is gay, right?

“But, fact of it is, ever since A New Hope, George Lucas had it that these two were a couple.”

Abrams went on to explain that R2D2 has a gender.

“Yeah, she’s a lady robot. Always has been. It’s just hard to tell as, you know, she just speaks in beeps and boops and, what with Star Wars being a family film, you can’t really show robot genitals.

“But, yeah, all the while, R2D2 was a girl and, specifically, C3P0’s girlfriend.”

Abrams shakes his head and laughs.

“Man, I don’t see why no one got that. The way the pair of them bicker and fight but always end up back together? Of course, they’re a couple.”

The new film will reveal that during the final party on Endor, C3P0 and R2D2 got so irritated by the Ewoks that they snuck off to make love.

It was then that Rey was conceived.

Whilst the new film will only allude to the moment of Rey’s conception, there are rumours that an 18-rated ‘XXXtreme edition‘ will be released along with the blu-ray which will feature a graphic, uncensored ten-minute scene of R2D2 and C3P0 making love.