A surprise sequel to the Oscar-winning Marriage Story has been announced that will see the couple from the first film reconcile and live happily ever after.
Marriage Story was acclaimed for its mature and realistic handling of modern divorce. However, many considered the end of the film a little depressing.
“It was quite a downer, I admit,” said director Noah Baumbach who explained that he’d fought for a different ending.
“What I wanted was to have the Adam Driver come to Scarlett’s character to drop off the kid and they just look into each other’s eyes and he takes her in his arms, and the music swells and he kisses her and we fade out to the tune of Love Affair’s Everlasting Love.
“But the studio overruled me. Goddamned studios, always going for the downbeat, realistic ending.”
However, Baumbach will now get to revisit his couple and their marriage travails in the new sequel.
“I only agreed to do it if I get complete control,” said Baumbach.
“So, yes, this has an unabashed happy ending. I make no bones about it, it’s the feelgood romantic comedy I’d always wanted.
“We start with both characters seeing other people and seemingly making the best of their new lives, but then they start looking for schools for the kid and, uh-oh, the best school is a strict religious institution and they only accept children from married couples.
“So, Adam and Scarlett have to pretend to married, with some pretty hilarious consequences, it has to be said. So as they pretend to be married, old feelings start to come to the surface and, well, you’ll have to watch it to find out.”
The surprise Marriage Story sequel comes hot on the heels of the announcement of a Parasite sequel that sees the Dad discover that the daughter was alive along and so breaks out of the cellar, finds his daughter, and the family live together happily ever after.
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Morgan Freeman in Deep Impact to have face added to Mount Rushmore
The first new Presidential addition to the iconic Mount Rushmore in it’s eighty-year history has been announced – Morgan Freeman playing President Beck in 1998’s comet classic Deep Impact
The new sculpture will be of Morgan Freeman’s President Beck looking sad because they couldn’t blow up the comet, and will sit alongside the famous sculptures of Presidents George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, Abraham Lincoln and another one.
“Hey, Rushmore is terrific, you know? You can’t improve on it,” said Bryan Sasquatch of the National Parks Services.
“But then, the other day, I was looking at a photo, and I thought – I can improve on it.”
Bryan realised that the only thing that could be better than four giant heads carved into a batholith would be five giant heads carved into a batholith .
“Exactly, and you don’t have to take that big of a leap to realise that the fifth head needs to be our fifth best President – Tom Beck from Deep Impact. It’s the only logical choice.”
Work will begin on the fifth head as soon as Mr Sasquatch can locate his old VHS of Deep Impact and if the giant head of Morgan Freeman as President Beck proves popular then he’s already prepared another improvement.
“Well, it seems fairly obvious to me that the next addition would be our sixth best President.”
“President Marcus Robbins from Sharknado 3: Oh Hell No!”