Final Fantasy VII remake to get remake

A new remake of the recent Final Fantasy VII remake has been announced for late 2024.

The original Fantasy VII remake was a huge hit in 2020, and producer Square Enix clearly feel that a brand new remake of the remake, updated for 2024, could really capture gamers’ imaginations.

“I think that people have a real nostalgia for the classic gameplay of last year,” said Square Enix executive Jeremy Bastard.

“So, a remake of the Final Fantasy VII remake could be a real hit.”

Mr Bastard had a bold vision of what the remake would look like.

“Well, essentially, we’re thinking that it’s the same game but with the word ‘remake’ on the box and a slightly higher price tag.

“I mean, there’s not a lot of games out there right now, so everyone’s pretty desperate.

“We’ll also say that the music’s been remastered because no one really understands what that means.”

There will also be a Final Fantasy VII remake remake deluxe edition which features a code for a downloadable pair of trousers for Cloud that are a slightly different shade of grey to the trousers in the standard version.

It is unknown how much more the deluxe edition will cost, but estimates range from ‘more’ to ‘quite a lot more.’

It is thought that Square Enix are also planning a remake of the Final Fantasy VII remake remake for 2025, but they may just abandon that plan to go round to gamers’ houses and just simply steal their money while they’re asleep instead.