Defying everyone’s expectations that, following Rise of Skywalker, the hugely popular money-hoovering mega-franchise would be quietly mothballed, Disney have confirmed a new trilogy will begin in 2022.
“Well, I for one, did not see this coming,” said movie industry analyst Stewart James.
“I mean, other than the prospect of making more money than a man with a ‘print your own money’ machine, what’s in it for them?
“If anything, I’d have thought it’d be more of a pain than anything else. They’re going to have to build another giant warehouse in which to store all the cash, then hire people to guard the warehouse. Who needs the aggravation?”
However, fans were relieved.
“Well, I’m relieved,” said a fan.
“I had this horrible idea that they were going to completely stop making Star Wars films and make low-budget, black and white indie films about the struggles of tenant farmers in 1950s Wales.
“Which, I’d have thought, would feature very few lightsaber battles.
“So, yeah, new Star Wars trilogy, thank heaven for that.”
In similar news to the announcement that more Star Wars films will be coming, Religious experts have said that the Pope remains Catholic, and scientists have confirmed that bears continue to defecate in the woods.
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