It’s the weekend, time to set off on that epic quest with a plucky group of misfits to banish the evil wizard from the realm. But if that sounds like a lot of bother, then why not watch these great films instead.
Saturday
Shawshank Redemption ITV4 21.05
Man goes to prison, puts up poster, escapes.
Reservoir Dogs Dave 22.00
Men do robbery then argue about it.
Avengers Assemble BBC1 17.35
Good looking people in brightly coloured costumes punch special effects in the face until they go away.
Sunday
The King’s Speech BBC1 00.00
Posh man learns to swear.
Not to be confused with the King’s Peach, because that’s his snack.
Cinderella BBC1 16.05
Woman loses shoe. Finds it. Marries Prince (Not the popstar) (presumably. I’ve not seen it).
The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel More4 18.35
They say ‘Best,’ they’ve clearly never stayed at the Travelodge overlooking the flyover in Chelmsford.
New at the cinema this weekend
Nothing
Seriously. Watch Avengers: Endgame again.
Oh, alright then. You’ve got Killers Anonymous which looks like every direct-to-video release of the nineties and The Souvenir which is middle-class people being quietly appalling to each other.
DVD of the week
Taxi Driver
Angry man gets rubbish haircut so kills some people. A Jean-Claude Van Damme film with delusions of grandeur and a jazzy score.
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