I Could ‘Bee’ So Good for You. Study Finds Bees Respond Positively to Minder

A new study has turned the world of bee-keeping on its head with the revelation that not only can bees recognise when Minder is on TV, but they respond positively to the 80s classic.

“Well, we were trying to find out the effect classic ITV TV shows have on bees,” explained study leader Kevin Bootstrap, Professor of Minder at Oxford University.

“We placed a TV in the centre of our apiary and played out a variety of classic ITV shows. The Sweeney, Rising Damp, Sharpe, the Jewel in the Crown, Auf Wiedersehen Pet, Van Der Valk – there was no noticeable difference in the behaviour of the bees. 

“It was as if the TV wasn’t on, the bees just went about their business making honey and doing what the Queen told them.”

However, as soon as Minder came on, there was a clear and obvious change in the bees’ behaviour.

“It was incredible to see. As the theme tune started, this huge swarm of bees gathered round the television. It seemed to be that, like people, the bees were thoroughly enjoying Dennis Waterman’s rendition of ‘I Could Be So Good For You.’

“As the song finished, they went back to work, but their work rate was incredible. By the time the episode had finished, a single hive had produced nearly half a jar of honey. That’s about a fortnight’s worth.”

Professor Bootstrap is trying to identify why Minder has such an effect on the bees.

“It’s certainly very strange. I suspect that, like many people, the bees’ dads used to really enjoy watching Minder on a Thursday evening, and that pleasant memory makes the bees happy and more hardworking.

The results are expected to lead to further study in the effects of repeats of old TV on insects.

“Well, yes, I suppose the effect of Butterflies on butterflies is the obvious first area to examine, but my expertise is Minder, so I’ll leave that to colleagues.”