"At least with a running time of seven and a half days it won't go on for as long as the extended Lord Of The Rings trilogy.”
It will tell the story of how main character Synonym makes the trepidatious and terrifying journey from Analogue to Metonym
The film has been hailed as a ‘profound allegory for the inevitability of violence in the face of pacifism,’ by some, and ‘stupid’ by others.
In 3150 BC, it wasn’t called Egypt, it was called Ancient Egypt, and it was in this mysterious land that movies were invented.
"I think there is something really wrong with the screening I saw! The whole screen was fuzzy right through the whole showing! "
"If this sounds confusing from a cinematic point of view then please rest assured that everything will fall into place"
Vin Diesel will play Gwyndaf Jones, a struggling hill farmer secretly in love with Myfanwy the post-mistress – played by the Rock
Every initial cinema release will now by advertised as ‘beta’ and retroactively fix glaring continuity issues, plot holes and disastrous miscastings.
“Our first thought was, we remake it for 2018? You know, have Ed Sheeran play the girl and the kids from Stranger things standing on each other’s shoulders playing the beast."
Although set largely on another planet at a point in the future, the film is more relevant to how we live our lives today than films about how we live our lives today.